Brain Cells on a “FIGHT”

I have read a lot many times that the more we think, the more problems we create for ourselves. But then tell me just one way to stop my brain from thinking especially when every other thing happening makes your brain cells active.

Then someone said when you have lots of things in your mind the best you can do is share it with someone and in worst case when you have no body to share ‘WRITE IT DOWN’.

To say that I am lost would be an understatement. I had no clue who I was and I had no clue what I wanted from life— all I knew was that it sure as heck wasn’t this. Conventional wisdom would say, “Think hard and figure your problem at all costs.” Instead, I did the opposite— I dropped the exhausting notion that I had to have it all figured out, and I dove head first into the deep waters of uncertainty.

The question that I ask myself is: can life ever be certain?
Is it even possible to have it all figured out? Does such a thing even exist? The one’s I consider my friends are really my friends? The one’s according to me our happy, are really happy? Why on earth I’m the one overweight and have to compromise on normal stuff? If I’ll ever find someone who’ll love me the way I am? When will I feel that yes I have achieved something? When will my dreams come true?

Not to be depressing, but life is weird.

Who’s to say that any single thing in your life might not change in an instant?
Maybe life is a never-ending mystery, and your only job is to learn to be ok with that. But till when? Why is that every time I have to compromise with my dreams and wishes and especially when the compromises I’m doing is just because of the not so fair life. I can rest in the questions; I can live in the bittersweet mystery.

Life it is confusing, rough, and twisted. Every single one of us has a destined road –imposed to us. I believe paths can be switch; fate can be change, for everything is possible if we just believe. Everything's racing through my mind but mixed, so mixed and confusing!
What should I to do at first? Is this, what I have to start with?
Or is this more important? I have to decide what's better, what's more important, and what’s more efficacious!
Why is everything difficult?
How can I then trust myself? And how can I achieve something when I'm deciding always to go in the wrong direction? Time After Time, I find I question my life. How I went wrong? Will it ever be right? Will I rise? Will I fall? Stand tall? Continue asking but, only God knows."

I still feel lost.

But just as I had done before, I gave myself permission to feel this way. I learned to hold the uncertainty and to live in it until it was no longer an enemy. I learned to rest in the open-ended question that is life and to let myself steep in the mystery and the wonder of it all.
But at the same time, I have things figured out more than I ever have before. I’ve learned to look less to others for definition and more to myself. I no longer need your attention to feel like I’m somebody. For the first time in my life, I’d rather be alone than be untrue to myself.

Woke up this morning glanced outside my bedroom window I can see my life so clearly, in this place I’m supposed to be. I can see the light now, kind of dim really aren’t that bright now but still giving me a ray of hope. If I want to survive doing it now is the right time I got to try and save me, anything I got to do, I got to do perfect.

It's too much too handle. I'm happy with life but, I got this feeling I'm not fully happy on whom I am. It’s all confusing but I know the major problem is that I think too much. But do I have a solution to it?


"To make decisions and find solutions to your problems is one of the hardest things to learn and a big step to become older, wiser"
said once my mother, and she's right!

So I sit down and think about the things that I've done and I will do....tomorrow, today and yesterday. Maybe I will sit down and think about the things I did. And then I would see the right decisions that I've should made.
And so I would stand up again and would see in my mind what to decide next. And then I would think about it longer than normally.
And then I would find the way out to a bright place.